ISAAC IS GOD. ALL BOW DOWN BEFORE ISAAC.
Yes, that's right folks, here is my Isaac Hanson dedication! Come one, come all, to the wonderful world of Isaac praising!
Ike knows you should be praising Ike.
I know you people. Now you're all saying "Whaa? Ike? But, you have a Taylor Dedication! You like Taylor, even though he is married, how can you like Ike? You only like Ike because he's not married LOSER!!!"
You couldn't be more wrong.
Well, maybe you could if you said things like "Wow, your webpage is sooo not creepy!", but we don't need to go there.
You see, about four years ago, I attended my first Hanson concert ever and had the great fortune to be near Isaac. I then realized Isaac is the most amazing human being on Earth. He's the hawtest thing since sliced bread. Uh, yeah, you know how hawt sliced bread is. It is especially hot when heated. Mmm, complex carbohydrates.
Of course, as much as I may describe the experience as amazing, standing there in awe of Ike, and such and such, giving you the idea I was standing still there in the crowd, taking it all in - the truth is, I spent most of it in a crazed frenzy, trying to touch Isaac when he was close to me, which didn't work. At all.
How can this man not send you into a crazed frenzy upon first sight?
I could stare at this picture for days. Maybe someday I will.
I think I wasn't as into Isaac at first (I loved him personality wise, his voice, but something wasn't quite there yet). Isaac, as much as I love you, you just weren't at your physical appearance peak in 1997.
Uhm. Did you notice that you're singing in front of a giant pansy?
But, oh, how quickly things change. An by quickly, I mean, taking several years to do so.
Physical perfection.
Aww.
I didn't think things could get any better after that.
But then they did.
EXCUSE ME, WHY ARE YOU NOT IN MY BED?!
Okay, maybe it's because I'm asking questions like that to you on a website.
Come on, Isaac. You know you want to marry me. We have a lot in common, like, being computer nerds.
And... uh... um... okay, maybe that's it, but I say that's enough to build a strong marriage.
I think this is the best possible next step in our lives because, unfortunately for you, my infatuation seems permanent.
Ike is a KILLER BEE. It's so cute I giggle, then still swoon. I need help.
LIFEbeat, I was fairly close to Isaac again. Three years later. In a crowd, going unnoticed. Same with the other three shows I saw that summer. I thought that something needed to change.
But the most that ended up happening was at the last show of the '04 Tour I was hanging out by the bus with people and Isaac came out and ran into and out of the bus, and the girl I was with tried to say "hi" and "have a good show", and I just stared unable to speak, and I tried to wave and smile but he did not wave or smile. I think we interrupted him.
Note to self: Do not annoy Isaac in the future.
If I can ever meet him, and frighten him, then my life would be complete. Oh well, here's to dreams, eh? *clinks glass against the air. all allone. all alone*
Raise the roof.
This is, I think, Isaac's reaction to my website.
Thank you God for this somewhat edible bounty before us, prepared by Taylor. And thank you for the webmaster of The Cheesy Land Of Hanson being far away from me. Amen